Crap...

can't sleep again...

still thinking.... and having slight headach now due to all these sleepless nights I think...

Anyway...
Just thought of something...

I am always against girls wearing makeup...
especially those that are already pretty but due to the make up they put on themselves made them look worst... (ironic?)

But then again there are two sides to everything... some of them dun put make up is like guys not styling their hair when they go out... (horrible)-----> [ but of coz that applies to those that needed to put makeup and style their hair lar]

At some occasions, girls put on makeup really enhance their beauty and make them really look gorgous. Occasions and events like Dinner and Dance... gosh some girls really like babe dolls and cinderalla... (and I got photo to prove..)

So it depends...
Those know me well know that I do not like girls wearing make up... cause for the very simple reason "natural = beauty"
But there is one make up that I find my self really attacted to cause of someone...
That is girls wearing lip gloss (hope I spelled right).

Lip gloss is a miracle invention I think cause they can convert a normal lips which looks dry at times to still dry lips but look watery...

That watery effect is as though it make the lips super kissable... (not as to really must kiss)
What I trying to say that it really work nicely on girls...

Bad part about it is that... though it makes the lips look watery, it is not watery at all haha... infact it is kinda sticky... (so that makes it unkissable though it seems really kissable...)

But still pretty bah... that's my point... lol...

Thoughts like this keep hovering around my mind... I really can't sleep...

Need me to spell it out for you?

You should know right?

By now...

It's 3.40am....

I can't bloody hell sleep~ AGRHHHH

Every.... everytime I close my eyes I have to think...
It lingers in my mind pestering me...
My regrets....

Sweet memories, Sad moments...
I have to go through a flash back almost every night and it is really getting tormenting...

I can't sleep...

Hearing my uncle's pickup passes by everyday around this time to go to market to sell chicken...
How many night has it been?

can this be cured? I want back my sleep... >.< align="center">Heartaches...

am bored...

lonely...

Kinda disappointed...

In fact very? lol... just been waiting for it almost a week...

But shit happens I guess... and always happens to me...

It is worst for her... she's sick...

I blame u god... (retribution for not believing in any i think)

Repay me by making her well asap...

"Thursday"... Gosh...

If caring = Kapo/busybody then love would be equals to irritation.

Hell long have i blogged and many things had happen will summarise it.

An A for my industrial attachment, that greatly pulls up my GPA to 3.053... (Glimes of hope to enter local Uni?)
I was really hopping for this result as I felt that I indeed put in alot of effort. That day I screw up my final presentation, I was really down... but at the day I know my results, I could not sleep the entire night.

What have I been doing?
God, that question is something I want to know too.
Been sleeping and playing games all day long, pratically 24/7 rotting my life away.
My life is a mess.. cause my body can no longer tell the difference between morning and night time.
It gets tired at about 6-7am and wakes up at about 1-3pm. it is super screwed up.

Currently awaiting for NS, no one will want to hire a temp staff like me. So I am jobless with no income.

Dinner and Dance...
It was a memorial night, as it was the first time I ever experience such a event of my own reasons..(dun think anyone can understand >.<)

The MC is lame, the games are lame, food is good but very few chances to eat due to time constrain. But it was fun as it was the final gathering for my poly life.
I won a passport size photo frame which is pink in colour that says "I love you 4ever" and it cost $1.95.
They did not even bother to take out the price tags.

People from my course side barely less than 20 people attended while the other side had over 60+ so that night we were pratically overwhelmed.
I was really surprise that night, for the past 3 years I did not realise there were handful of really pretty girls over at the other side until then. ( haha... may I am so blind I did not see them before...)

After the event we went Kbox to sing as it been a while we all had sing together. I really love singing, no matter if it is chinese songs or english songs but I had a few serious problems.
First of all, when singing chinese songs, I at time could not read the characters thus I duno how to pronounce it.
Then again, when choosing songs... I know alot of songs but I do not know the songs titles or sang by which artise thus I could not pick my songs.
Lastly, I really hopped my voice do not sound terrible as to torture those that is in the room with me cause I really could never hear my voice.
That night was the first time I drank beer and sang at them same time, gosh it is really work wonders as it really clears up my throat. (But I still hope I did not sound too bad)

Dreams...
My dream are getting more real each day...
I always thought dreams are related do what we do in the day... But it seems so real, so nice but at times also very sad...

It could be so realistic that I wake up really sad... Or I never wish I never want to wake up cause it is the only time I get to see her...

Though mostly I wake up not knowing what I dreamt about.. It is really the factor in making my day a happy one or a sad one.

Controlling dreams is one freaking fun think to do...

I am dreaming...

I am writing this post cause the server of JX2 is down and it will be back up in 4mins time there for ciaoz...

If I only I have a time machine, I could have kept my weather machine...

6th march again...

To think of it if everything's well, Happy anniversary...

Silly aren't I?

I no longer have the courage...

Failure...

Deep down inside me...

Missing her...

Why?

One evening just after a day's of tiring work, a lady bought herself a newspaper and a packet of famous Amos cookies and went to the park near by to relax.

"What a day!" she thought grumbling to herself as for the past 15mins she could not find an empty bench to rest her worn out legs and to read her newspaper.

She was really mad at her luck and when she was just about to head home, suddenly just right in front of her, a guy stood up and left. What's left on the bench was an old man reading a adult magazine.

"Gross!" was the word that flashed through her head.

"typical tiko pei" she mumbled and sweared, "curse my luck"

As it is obviously the only available seat left and if she goes home right now, she will be facing the cold walls of her house all by herself. She accepted her fate and sat down.

Warmth was felt instantly as she sat down and that felt rather good in the cold chilling night.

"Gosh, why can't it be the old man that left the beach and it was the guy that is left sitting on the bench? Oh! what the hell" she thought and whined to herself.

Feeling hungry, she opened her packet of cookies and started eat a piece as she update herself to what is happening to the world around her.

To her surprise, one she started eating, the old man started to take a piece from her packet of cookies too!

" What ill manners! fuck it agrr as if my day has not been worsen enough, now I have to share my dinner with some old man". Glaring hard at the old man.

But looking at the age of that guy, he was about 65 to 75 and decided not to pursue the matter and let it rest after all it is just a piece.

Moments later, she took another piece to eat, the old man did the same as though mimicking her action.

" Freak fine, have another piece if u want! perhaps he is just hungry and he is after all an old man." Consoling herself.

This continues for the next hour and she just dreaded her day/luck even more as the moment passes. Trying real hard to be as optimistic as possible though each time that pervertic old man
takes one of her cookies and munching it without having her concences, she really felt like giving the old man a tight slap or telling the old man off.

Finally it was down to the last piece of cookie and she was just half way done with her newspaper. Knowing that it was the last piece, she really want to see how the old man would react as in would he be so thick skinned and take the very last piece of the cookie.

Waiting, waiting but strangly there was no movement from the old man. To the very last page of her news paper, she gives up and was about to end her reading session and getting the hell out of there, the old man strikes.

The only difference is that this time round, the old man broke the cookies into half and took the other half and left the bench.

Being dumb founded, the lady stood at the bench not believing that there is actually such a person exisiting in the world.

Finished her newspaper, she headed to the nearest MRT station to get back home. In between, she kept wondering why she had let the old man have his ways and not teach him a lession.

To end her miserable day, gods played a final trick on her. She could not find her easylink card anywhere and she started to dig her hand bag for it. And it all the mist of her panic, she found a packet of famous Amos cookies in her bag exactly like the one she had eatten just now.

She realise the truth...

I guessed I am forgotten...

But she will always have a place in my heart.